Hello Dayton

I have been saying “I’ll get back to writing my blog” since, well my last post was August of 2015. Hey, at least I didn’t wait a whole year. Good on me!!!!!!

So here I am at the Erma Bombeck Writer’s Conference where I paid a lot of money to learn about writing and what would be a better place to return to my blog than here and now.

erma2Here I am in┬álovely Dayton, Ohio. At the Minneapolis airport I was stopped at security and patted down and felt up. Never happened before. I am even prescreened for god’s sake!!!

I looked at the screen — which apparently is a no no because I was immediately told to turn around — and there were squares around my neck. I can’t figure out what was in there that would have set off an alarm. Perhaps I have too many skin tags and if I rub them together I could create some kind of spontaneous fire? I was asked to remove everything from my back pocket — I had no back pocket so I’m thinking butt cellulite perhaps showed up. They also rubbed something on the palms of my hands and then scanned it. Cootie checker? Perhaps I had rubbed Daisy’s belly one too many times. I don’t know.

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