Olympic Fever Is Over

Yes, my favorite Olympic moment. 

Well the Olympics are over. I like watching them, but I wish I didn’t have to watch so much beach volleyball. I heard that the toughest ticket to get was to beach volleyball. Guess I’m, once again, out of the loop on this one.

My favorite is diving. I look at how much they can do in a matter of seconds. They twist and turn and somersault and then go into the water in this straight line. I can’t even eat an Oreo in the amount of time they do all of that. I will never get into the Oreo Olympics at this pace. I must keep practicing until I’ve perfected my skills — no matter what the sacrifices are.

In other news, my boyfriend Randy Travis seems to have gotten in trouble. Arrested for drunk driving, found laying in the road next to his smashed up car. Oh and by the way, he was naked. Before he crashed his car he walked into the local convenience store, naked, and wanted cigarettes. After being arrested he threatened to kill the police. Randy, Randy, Randy — who do you think you are, Keifer Sutherland? Yes, I blame myself. Randy knows that Keifer is my number one and he’s just trying to show me that he can be a stupid alcoholic too. Boys, stop fighting over me before one of you really screws up and ends up going on tour with Charlie Sheen.