Senior Rate (55 and over) 15% off!!!!!!

Oh shit, I am a senior. My friend Nancy told me I qualified for senior rates but I said no, that’s for people 60 and older, but I saw this yesterday and I almost cried.

I don’t want to be a senior. I didn’t like being a senior in high school, college, and now life. In high school it meant you had to move on to work and real life, in college it meant you needed to find a job and pay back this ginormous loan you just accumulated, and now it means you have to move on to, well I’d rather not discuss it.
15% off, oh brother. The old coot rate. I’m a coot. Of course I’m a cute coot so what the heck. I better get going so I can shuffle off to work, if I can remember where I work. Now where is my cane?