The Return of the Crazy Target Lady — Yuck.

Oh shit … she’s back.

Now I love the woman who plays the part — Maria Bamford — she’s hysterical and a very nice person. But I can’t stand the crazy Target lady … she’s like June Cleaver on steroids.

And speaking of Target — anyone going shopping at midnight on the Friday after Thanksgiving? I used to work stocking shelves overnight at Target and I’ve spent enough midnights at Target to last me a lifetime. I just pray that the people who show up don’t carry box openers like we used to — I kept waiting for a knife fight to break out between the Hosiery and the Sporting Goods department.  “That’s my pneumatic lift dolly,” “No it’s my pneumatic lift dolly,” bang-biff-boom. It was nerve wracking tension like that all the time. One time I was suppose to take an entire cart filled with toothbrushes and put them on the correct peg. A cart full of toothbrushes — well there’s a space between the wall of one aisle and the wall of the other aisle and one day when they moved those walls they found about 300 toothbrushes that someone had placed there for safekeeping.

I just can’t imagine people wanting to shop at midnight — well at least shop at Target or Best Buy or whatever the hell else is open. Now I’ve been known to stop late at an all night grocery store on my way home from something or another because there is such thing as an Oreo emergency or a Ben & Jerry crisis but …

Perhaps I don’t have the spirit of Black Friday shopping. I’ll work on that between now and the stroke of midnight 11/24 or is it 11/25 — I’ve never been clear on that. Is midnight the start of the new day or the end of the old day. I have a headache now.

2 thoughts on “The Return of the Crazy Target Lady — Yuck.

  1. I'm a bit disappointed, as I thought the crazy Target Lady would be Kristina Wigg. Is her character modeled after your Target lady? Do you know who Kristin Wigg is, or are you too mature to watch SNL at your (our) age?

    Every Thanksgiving, every single one, the wimminfolk cut out ads, dog-ear pages, organize our sale items and make lists. We plan the time of departure, lay out our route, appoint someone to get up first and wake the others, etc. Not one of us has ever gone shopping on Black Friday. We're a slothful lot.

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